The Beauty of “NO”


“I’ve learned that working with the negative can make for better pictures…”~Drake

Quick story: I have a close friend who was dating a guy over the summer of 2012. She really liked him. Everything was going well and then he started to act funny towards her. My friend has a very no-nonsense attitude, so the minute she noticed his actions she told him how she felt. He became distant and they stopped speaking. She never understood why things didn’t work out. She wondered for a while, “what could she have done to change their outcome ?”. To her, it felt like rejection but as time passed she got over it.

Fast-forward to the beginning of January 2013. One day my friend was in her house preparing to go out and her television was on the news channel. As she walked opposite of where her TV was to grab a jacket, she heard the news reporter say “a man is wanted for the shooting of his ex-girlfriend and the murder of the ex-girlfriend’s mother”. For some reason my friend’s intuition (I call it God’s voice) told her to see who that man was. However, by the time she got to the TV the guy’s picture was taken off. She just sat and paid attention to the story and then the picture was shown again. The same “wanted” guy shown on the news channel was the guy she dated in the summer time!!!

I have asked my friend for permission to share her story and my outlook.The lesson I received was this….


At times, we as human beings want things to be ideal and go our way. This can be in relation to anything; our career, education, love life, even the traffic flow on random highways, etc…And when things don’t go as planned and/or we feel rejected, we get disappointed.

As I’ve gotten older, I have become aware and accepted that life will NEVER go the way I’ve planned! So I don’t really plan much. Don’t get me wrong, I have goals and things I want to accomplish but the way I will go about achieving them is not set in stone. I am open to “life”, everything expected and unexpected. I’m no longer basing the life given to me on my time-frame. I am also open to INEVITABLE rejection…

In my friend’s situation, it seemed the “no” she received was from the guy she was dating. I believe the “no” was from God. The guy’s rejection allowed her to avoid something bigger than she could have ever imagined. He obviously was capable of murder. My verdict is the “no” worked out in her favor.


My friend is now thankful for her “no” and besides that word being said, it is also wise to say it. Not EVERY thing is meant for you and your well-being. “No”  can  save you from things seen and unseen and it can also promote you in its own way.

I say, be appreciative of all the “no’s” you’ve ever received and/or had to say. When you’re late to that interview and/or work, when that guy/girl doesn’t call back, when you don’t get accepted to that program, and even when you get lost along the way….BE THANKFUL.

KNOW that everything will work out for YOUR good. For I find there to be so much power and beauty in the word, “NO”!

*On the “Be Encouraged” page (” ) find a touching and motivational one-minute clip.

*Featured this week under Ohemma’s Words, ( is an original poem titled “My Possession” by yours truly!

*Lastly, “It is Written…” ( has two poems from one of my favorite books of all time, Langston Hughes’ “The Dream Keeper”!

Stay you & enjoy,

~ Queen

~P.S. Remember 🙂 ….images-13

8 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Daezi Ann
    Jan 23, 2013 @ 01:30:54

    I’m sure this friend had her intuitions and the fact that she told him how strongly she felt about the situation made him distant shows that he wasn’t willing to fight for whatever, but it was for the best because of his background. well i’m glad that bullet was dodged. she deserves the best and Yes God knows what’s best for us. So NO saves us from alot


  2. Janelle
    Jan 23, 2013 @ 01:35:50

    So very true Queen. I think I’m learning this lesson now. I’m also having difficulty accepting it. But like you said and no matter how much I may want to fight it, I will have to let go and let God.

    P.S. I’m so very proud of you and you have truly been an inspiration to me.


    • ohemmawrites
      Jan 23, 2013 @ 01:40:04

      Aww, thank you Janelly! You know you are always in my prayers & everything will work out for the best. I am very proud of you as well. One day we will look back at this part of our life and laugh at all the things we let stress us. I’m sure it’s all apart of the Master’s plan 🙂 xoxoxo


  3. Latoya
    Jan 23, 2013 @ 17:22:38

    That was beautiful. I learned how beautiful no can be at the age of 29. Glad your younger and 6 years smarter!


  4. Cheryl Flanders
    Jan 29, 2013 @ 17:20:26

    Wow!! Great insight and oh so true! Stay blessed


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