The Beauty of “NO”

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“I’ve learned that working with the negative can make for better pictures…”~Drake

Quick story: I have a close friend who was dating a guy over the summer of 2012. She really liked him. Everything was going well and then he started to act funny towards her. My friend has a very no-nonsense attitude, so the minute she noticed his actions she told him how she felt. He became distant and they stopped speaking. She never understood why things didn’t work out. She wondered for a while, “what could she have done to change their outcome ?”. To her, it felt like rejection but as time passed she got over it.

Fast-forward to the beginning of January 2013. One day my friend was in her house preparing to go out and her television was on the news channel. As she walked opposite of where her TV was to grab a jacket, she heard the news reporter say “a man is wanted for the shooting of his ex-girlfriend and the murder of the ex-girlfriend’s mother”. For some reason my friend’s intuition (I call it God’s voice) told her to see who that man was. However, by the time she got to the TV the guy’s picture was taken off. She just sat and paid attention to the story and then the picture was shown again. The same “wanted” guy shown on the news channel was the guy she dated in the summer time!!!

I have asked my friend for permission to share her story and my outlook.The lesson I received was this….

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At times, we as human beings want things to be ideal and go our way. This can be in relation to anything; our career, education, love life, even the traffic flow on random highways, etc…And when things don’t go as planned and/or we feel rejected, we get disappointed.

As I’ve gotten older, I have become aware and accepted that life will NEVER go the way I’ve planned! So I don’t really plan much. Don’t get me wrong, I have goals and things I want to accomplish but the way I will go about achieving them is not set in stone. I am open to “life”, everything expected and unexpected. I’m no longer basing the life given to me on my time-frame. I am also open to INEVITABLE rejection…

In my friend’s situation, it seemed the “no” she received was from the guy she was dating. I believe the “no” was from God. The guy’s rejection allowed her to avoid something bigger than she could have ever imagined. He obviously was capable of murder. My verdict is the “no” worked out in her favor.

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My friend is now thankful for her “no” and besides that word being said, it is also wise to say it. Not EVERY thing is meant for you and your well-being. “No”  can  save you from things seen and unseen and it can also promote you in its own way.

I say, be appreciative of all the “no’s” you’ve ever received and/or had to say. When you’re late to that interview and/or work, when that guy/girl doesn’t call back, when you don’t get accepted to that program, and even when you get lost along the way….BE THANKFUL.

KNOW that everything will work out for YOUR good. For I find there to be so much power and beauty in the word, “NO”!

*On the “Be Encouraged” page (https://ohemmawrites.com/be-encouraged/” https://ohemmawrites.com/be-encouraged/ ) find a touching and motivational one-minute clip.

*Featured this week under Ohemma’s Words, (https://ohemmawrites.com/ohemmas-words/) is an original poem titled “My Possession” by yours truly!

*Lastly, “It is Written…” (https://ohemmawrites.com/it-is-written/) has two poems from one of my favorite books of all time, Langston Hughes’ “The Dream Keeper”!

Stay you & enjoy,

~ Queen

~P.S. Remember 🙂 ….images-13

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One More Time

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Picture this: November 28th, 2012, three days before a family member’s wedding. You have the outfit all figured out, accessories to match and NO shoes! That was me two weeks ago. After searching in every store and boutique in NYC for the perfect heels, I finally went to Macy’s. I wanted the shoe chase to be over. Little did I know Macy’s was having a “one-day sale”. (I mean, when are they not?!) Everything around me was hectic.

After looking around shortly in the shoe department,  I found a cute BCBG platform heel. I asked a salesman for my size and tried it on. It fit perfectly! It was like… “Cinderella and the glass slipper”. 🙂Unknown-1

However, before I could crack a smile, the salesman told me my shoes weren’t paired in the box. I tried on the left side but the right side had to be found somewhere on the sales floor. I would have to find it in order to make the purchase.

That struck a chord in me because all I wanted to do was go home but I was confident I could find the other shoe. So I looked EVERYWHERE. I even asked random people to help me.I was focused! …Until half an hour later, I came to the realization that the shoe was nowhere to be found. I gave up and went home.

The next day I decided to try again. I looked at some different shoe stores but the heels I wanted at Macy’s were still on my mind. I knew in my heart they had to be there. So, I went back.

images-1I searched all over again and I asked a sales woman to help me. I said “Mam, I really want those shoes”. She told me there was a bin in the back that she would check. I never heard of this bin yesterday, so I got excited.

Five minutes later she came back with both shoes in the box! A beautiful pair of black-suede glittered platform BCBG heels. I never lost hope!

Through everything, the lesson I learned was: when you REALLY REALLY want something and you don’t get it the first time around but you still believe it’s possible and perfect for you, try one more time.

Don’t let something you like and/or love go, without attempting a different approach. That shoe could have been anywhere!images-4 But because I was determined and patient, I got what I came for. Even though I didn’t get it on the first day, with the first attempt.

Therefore, whatever you want, whatever is on your mind… don’t let it go so easily. If you believe it suits you perfectly, like a pair of black-suede platform heels, go back and GET it. Try one more time! 🙂

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Matthew 7:7 ~””Ask and it will be given to you; Seek and you will find; Knock and the door will be opened to you.”

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On the “Be Encouraged” page (https://ohemmawrites.com/be-encouraged/” https://ohemmawrites.com/be-encouraged/ ) find a priceless speech from the brilliant Steve Jobs at the 2005 Standford University Commencement.

Featured this week under “Ohemma’s Words“, (https://ohemmawrites.com/ohemmas-words/) is a poem titled ” Billet Doux” ~>that’s french for Love Letter …. xoxoxo

Lastly, “It is Written…” (https://ohemmawrites.com/it-is-written/) has an article from Black Enterprise, about seeking a mentor in your career field. Let me know how their advice works out for you!

Stay you & enjoy,

~Queen

Say “I Do!”

“There is a difference between interest and commitment. When you’re interested in something, you do it only when it’s convenient. When you’re committed to something, you accept no excuses, only results.” ~Kenneth Blanchard

Time to make a commitment! It doesn’t have to be the beginning of a new year or one’s wedding ceremony to pledge allegiance to a goal and/or person.

Personally, when I hear the word “commit” I wonder if I’ve ever done such a thing, wholeheartedly.The answer is yes but not for as long as I would have liked. Although it is great to say “I’m all in!” It can also be kind of scary, without realistic planning.

It is as simple to start out with an idea, as it is effortless to not see it through. This goes for relationships as well. Of course there is a difference between no longer being passionate vs. quitting. So, before you devote your time and attention to a subject, THINK. Be certain. Then embrace discipline. Meaning for better or worse, in sickness and in health, you go through with your decision…On the days you feel like it and especially on those days you don’t.

Michael Phelps, American swimmer and the most decorated Olympian of all time, once practiced EVERYDAY for 5 years straight to make it to the Olympic team. 365 days he said “I do!” to HIS dreams. Sean Garrett aka “The Pen”, one of the best songwriters in the music industry told me, “As a writer you should be writing every day. Even if you just sit there for an hour and nothing comes out on paper…dedicate the time to your craft.”

If you want to start your own business, declare “I do!” Then YOU must live and breathe it. Become the business… If you want to act, sing, teach and/or build houses, whatever it may be, work your way to that goal! Prepare and practice steadfastly. Memorize lines, rehearse songs and even “elevator pitches”, should an opportunity present itself with the right person.

I’m going to make my personal discipline sheet and everyday besides what I do in my spare time, I will set aside one hour to write and 15 minutes to read. I might have to give some activities up, like going out, watching TV, talking on the phone, etc… but I’m going to focus and commit. It would be my honor if we could start together and encourage one another to FINISH. Will you join me? If so, please say “I do!”…

On the “Be Encouraged” page (https://ohemmawrites.com/be-encouraged/) find an excerpt from “The Power to Commit” by Author and Motivational Speaker, Jill Koeing.

Posted under Ohemma’s Words, (https://ohemmawrites.com/ohemmas-words/) find some of my original creative writing.

Lastly, “It is Written…” (“https://ohemmawrites.com/it-is-written/) features one of my FAVORITE poems, “Live for You” by Sara Gunderson. I read it when I was twelve and loved it ever since. Hope you do too 🙂

Stay you & enjoy,

~Queen

Talk to Someone

The surface is everything we see when we open our eyes. It is everything I see. The outside since it is visible, can also easily be labeled because it stems from a point of view. However, when you want to go deeper things get a bit more complicated, particularly when dealing with people.

What if you have encouraging words that could change someone’s life and/or affect their next decision, in a positive way… how would you know?

If you only look at the exterior of a person and never speak to them, how would you know exactly what’s going on internally? Don’t depend on a smile because those can and will be fake.  You can’t rely on an “I’m okay” because that is a generic response.

For example, a car can appear shiny and gorgeous from the outside but when you actually try to drive it, it may not be able to move. You have to check the inside and make sure the engine is right. As beautiful as the car is, if the inside is screwed up, the car is useless.

Therefore, once a week, I challenge you to seek out at least one person and make it you’re mission to converse with them. Whether it is friend, family or stranger, see what they are about. You may discover you have more similarities than you thought. You may even have advice that could change a person’s entire situation and because you never spoke it, they never heard and the life changing took so long!

Go deeper than the obvious and you’ll be surprised! Everyone has a story, but not many people have someone to tell it to.

On the “Be Encouraged” page (https://ohemmawrites.com/be-encouraged/ ) find a list of events, shows, organizations, and ways to get involved in NYC! Freebies included.

Posted under Ohemma’s Words, (https://ohemmawrites.com/ohemmas-words/) find a poem, titled “An Alliance”, written in 2005.

Lastly, “It is Written…” (https://ohemmawrites.com/it-is-written/ ) debuts poetry from Sabrina D. Phillips, titled “The Perfect Friend”. One of my new favorites!

As always,    

Stay you and enjoy, 🙂

~Queen

“Who do you love?”


Who do you love” is a commonly used phrase and song title. One artist in particular that used this was LL cool J, back in 96’. It is also a sincere question…Who do you love? In this day in age, the question could possibly be answered easier if rephrased as, “what do you love?” Many times we go throughout life investing money, passion and time into things, more than we do a person … which is not much of an opportunity cost because at the end of the day people are always worth more, especially those closest to us.

Last year, same day different time, someone very close to me was in a car accident. My mom.  She had this…

And was taken out through the cut roof of this …

However, my mother is favored by an Awesome God, who grants protection and grace. So she left the hospital without one scratch. Things could have went differently but THANK God they didn’t. Today is also the day we remember the heroes and innocent lives taken in 2001, due to terrorism. All this to say, nothing and no one is promised nor guaranteed.  So when you figure out whom you love as opposed to what you love… Go ahead and tell em’!

Posted under Ohemma’s Words,(https://ohemmawrites.com/ohemmas-words/) find a poem, titled “I Know a Woman” & if you know of a great woman, don’t hesitate to share those words with her.

Found on the “Be Encouraged” page (https://ohemmawrites.com/be-encouraged/) is my real definition of love.

Lastly, “It is Written…” (https://ohemmawrites.com/it-is-written/ ) has my favorite poem from the living legend herself, Maya Angelou!

Stay you and enjoy, 

~Queen

Welcome Back!

New week, new challenges…So Ohemmawrites.com has new material!!!

We all have decisions we must make. Even choosing not to, is a choice of its own. Therefore, I wrote a unique note of inspiration featuring a link to Martha Beck’s article, “Get Unstuck! How to Make the Right Decision Every Time”. It can be found by visiting  “Be Encouraged” or click:         https://ohemmawrites.com/be-encouraged/

Posted under Ohemma’s Words, (https://ohemmawrites.com/ohemmas-words/) find a birthday poem, written by me at 12 years old and another of my works titled, “Love at 1st sight”… Oh la la la!

Lastly, “It is Written…” (https://ohemmawrites.com/it-is-written/) has a new addition of simple & stimulating words and of course I included my favorite quote of all time 🙂

Stay you & enjoy!

~Queen

Hello world!!

 

Welcome! Thank you for visiting and supporting OhemmaWrites.com. This is my personal page that showcases my excitement and connection with words. I love to write and be inspired! I hope this will be the first of many outlets to spread my passion with the world.

Among many inspirations of Ohemmawrites.com, a story in the Bible, titled “The Widow’s Oil” (2 Kings 4: 1-7) is what initially motivated me. I was introduced to this passage last year (summer of 2011) while attending the WEEN Academy. A professor had a lesson plan attached with a biblical message. Particularly focused on verse 2, the theme was “what do you have in your house?” That line always stuck out to me and from last year until recently, I meditated on what it really meant. As a young lady striving to be the best version of myself, I pondered, “What was in my house?” the house symbolizing what was within me. I questioned myself on what talents, gifts and blessings did I have that could benefit someone else? What did I bring to the table that could also get me to where I need to go?

About two months ago I found some old notebooks. They were filled with my creative writing from childhood. Included were tons of poetry, song lyrics from as early as 7 years old and even a short story about soul mates. (Lol, I don’t know what I was thinking!) After reading, I glanced at my bedroom dresser and noticed all my current notebooks and folders. All filled with poetry, song lyrics, magazine articles and short stories that to this day, I write. I slowly realized that what I found physically was an answer to my questions on what I had internally. I figured out what was in my house. I now choose to share it.

On Ohemmawrites.com under “Ohemma’s Words”, it will be updated frequently with my creative work, from both the past & present. “Be encouraged” will feature inspirational/knowledgeable words of others via video, links, excerpts from literary works, quotes and etc… “It Is Written” has my favorite writing pieces of others, about any and everything and lastly, the “About & Contact” pages tell who I am and how you can reach me.

Please feel free to leave feedback and comments. Most importantly, today take time out and do inventory of all that is at your disposal: your gifts, skills, past experiences and even the class that you thought was worthless. You are the 1st investor of your time, talent and treasure. What’s in your house?!

Stay you and enjoy,

~Queen

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